He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
Randomize
