If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
