NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
He did a backflip because drugs
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize
