Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
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