Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
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