Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
I just found a bag of teeth...
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
Randomize
