pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize
