well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
