Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Randomize
