you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
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