Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize
