I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
