Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
