I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize