He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
