just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
PANTIES FOUND
Randomize