This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
