I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Randomize
