So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
