I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Randomize