She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
