Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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