hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
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