Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
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