Your dad touched me again.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize