No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize
