I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize
