So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
