You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
Randomize
