We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
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