I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Randomize
