how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
