I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize