i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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