I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize