Sry I called you an 8
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
Dear sober self, your keys are on the table in front of you the only way your typing this is with autocorrect goodnight love you
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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