So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
