I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Success! We fucked roommates!
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