you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Randomize