I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Randomize