Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
