i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
found the other keg... it's in the tree
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Randomize
