Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
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