ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
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