he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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