about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
the liver wants what the liver wants
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Randomize
