but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize
