I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Randomize
