you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
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