But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
