Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
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