When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
