as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Randomize
